My Mr.

Every year Hallmark celebrates the holidays that are known as 'Mother's Day' and 'Father's Day'. On these days one should be EXTRA thankful for their mom and dad.
I have always thought these hallmark holidays were simply to make me a crazy stressed out person trying to make sure that we have all the gifts and the cards and the flowers and no one gets their feelings hurt and planning dinners and lunches and breakfasts... I mean, it goes on, and on, and on. Its too much. I usually do not handle it gracefully.

This year was interesting celebrating this day as parents. Real parents.
I have a whole new appreciation for mothers and fathers. My eyes have been opened to what a mom really does to make a day go smoothly and to the sacrifices a father makes.
This year, I got to be a mom on mothers day. I got to spend the day loving on my sugar, we ate breakfast at my favorite place called Cafe Strudel (yummo), my sweet Mr. went above and beyond helping with the Sugar for the day, and getting me the most beautiful bracelet. It was truly special.

The day after I became a mommy to Sugar.

The person I REALLY want to talk about is my Mr. and his first Father's Day.
You know, I have always heard that a love for your husband grows when you have a baby. You see that man that you love so much holding a perfect miracle, that the two of you created with the love that you have for one another. I can now attest to the fact that, it is beautiful.
I did melt all over when I watched my Mr. hold Sugar for the first time. Watching him become a daddy instantly was aw inspiring.
On Fathers Day this year, I really reflected on what a wonderful daddy Mr. is to Sugar.
Let me tell you about this wonderful man.
When we found out we were pregnant, I know he was nervous. He was worried about how our lives would change, how we would afford a baby, how we would be responsible for a tiny little human being.

This was my 4th test. I was about 4 weeks pregnant at the time.
I took it first thing in the morning on the day Mr. had a big job interview so I had to keep it a secret until he got home

This is how I told him.
 I put a "honey bun" in the oven and told him I was cooking a surprise for him and to take a look in the oven.

This is a video of him opening the oven. He was a little in shock I think.
 "I don't even like honey buns" hahaha
Also, please forgive the awesome  filming. I was nervous.

He handled it with such grace and the first time we saw that little bean on the ultra sound and heard the little "swoosh, swoosh, swoosh" of his heart beat, I watched every apprehension he had melt away before my eyes. He was in love. He watched the screen with the biggest grin on his face. He was in aw.
 

This was at about 9 weeks along

This is at 18 weeks when we found out that our sugar was a boy

As our little gift grew, so did I. A LOT. I grew and grew and grew. A LOT. Did I mention I got REALLY big? Even though I looked like a large ocean dwelling mammal, Mr. told me I was beautiful every day. He would rub my belly and tell me thank you for being such a great Mama already. He would rub my feet and my back. He slept on a sliver of the bed that wasn't engulfed by the THOUSAND or so pillows that I moved into our bed. He would listen to me complain about my heart burn and my hips hurting. He went to rushes in the middle of the night to get me hot fudge Sundays and milkshakes. He never complained. He never made me feel dumb.

I was 37 weeks pregnant here.

When our little boy finally made his debut, he was hooked. I knew it. He said to me then that the whole time I was pregnant he knew there was a tiny little boy growing in there, but it still wasn't real. He felt the kicks and dealt with pregnant me, but it just wasn't real yet. When he held that squishy little lump of love. It got real.

This was the first time Mr. held our sugar. 

During my time in what I have deemed "the newborn fog" Mr. was AMAZING. He took care of our little darling's every need. He brought him to me only to eat and all the other times he would take him and hold, play, change, and clean him all by himself so I could sleep. He even woke up with me during late night feedings for a while so I wouldn't be lonely. When my fog got worse, he would wake up and feed our baby during the night with milk I had pumped, and let me sleep. He never complained. He held me when my hormones went nuts and I was crying for no reason and he encouraged me to get out of the house and have 'me time'. This man, was my true knight and shinning armor.

This was the last meal at the hospital before we left after our 3 day stay.

A father is someone who puts his families needs above his own. Its that simple. My Mr. gets father of the year in my opinion. 

Months are FLYING by...

I always thought that those people who say "Watch out, they grow up so fast!" or"They will be grown before you know it!" were being dramatic and lame.
I was wrong. VERY wrong.
The thing is, every day seems to last for an eternity. There is so much that has to go into a day, that when my alarm goes off at 5:30, it seems like there is NO WAY that I will make it back in the bed. Ever. The day will go on and on. And on. Similar to Groundhog day, you know the movie from the 90's where the day never ended it just started over again and again? Yeah, that's how it feels when I swing my legs over the side of the bed when the sun isn't even up yet.
Someone once told me that "the days are long, but the years are short." with a child.
I thought that was a very strange thing to say and seemed quite contradictory. However, I now understand the saying.
Some days with my squishy sugar are SO LONG, sometimes I feel guilty for being so excited when Mr. comes in the door and I all but throw the squish at him.
The past three months with my Sugar have flown by. Some days have  been long, some have been short, some have been full of giggles, and others full of tears and frustration. Regardless, I feel blessed to have experienced parenthood for half of a year, 182.5 days, 4,380 hours, 262,800 minutes of being a mom. Yeah, I still have no idea what I'm doing. Yeah, I still take it one (long) day at a time. The important thing is, I have kept him alive, fed, clean, and happy for a whole 6 months. WOOHOO! Go me!
When December comes around and I am looking back on the year with my Sugar I will probably look at this post and think, "Sheesh, I knew nothing. What an amateur."

Here is a look at the Squish form the past three months.

  Sugar is 6 months old. He weighs 21 pounds and is wearing size 12-18 month clothes. He is massive, I know. 
He loves sitting up all by himself, putting EVERYTHING in his mouth, giving kisses, jumping in his johnny jumper, Sophie the Giraffe, and rubbing his lovey over his face to go to sleep. He gets really excited when his daddy comes home from work. They are best friends. It's outrageously cute. He also talks ALL DAY LONG. Mostly just da da da da all day, much to my dismay, but never the less, he is a chatter box just like mama!

Three Months with The Sugar

Every day with this little love bug is so precious.

I cannot believe how fast three months has come and gone. Our spoon full of sugar is becoming a little more not so little every day. In fact, I keep being told that he is more like a BUCKET full of sugar. He is a solid 15.4 pounds.He is wearing 6-9 month clothes. He has really started talking, smiling, laughing, and coming alive. He is so sweet and SO hard to put down because all anyone wants to do is snuggle him.

Saturdays

Saturdays take on a whole new meaning when you are a working mom.
I never thought I would be a working mom. I always pictured myself as a bit of a "Stepford wife" with the perfectly clean home, dinner on the table by 6, laundry done, children clean, and a smile.
WRONG.
This is SO not my life.
My day starts at 5 am when I hear the sweet sound of Sugar screaming through the monitor informing me that the time to eat is NOW. I get to love on my baby boy for the 30 minutes it takes to feed, change, and rock back to sleep. I then get ready for work, make my coffee (I would like to talk to someone who can arrange an IV drip of this for me), and head out the door to work. Mr. takes Sugar to my parents, my sisters, or waits on my mom to come to our house for the day.
I spend my day with OTHER peoples babies. I help them tie their shoes, wipe their tears, remind them to cover their mouths when they cough and blow their noses, tell them when they have leftover syrup from breakfast on their cheeks, point to words as they read them, and celebrate with them as they solve "hard" addition problems. During this time, I am also juggling parent notes, paper work, answering emails, creating lesson plans, checking work, answering questions, and trying not to feel guilty or sad for not spending my day with MY baby.
I try to leave work by 2:45. It takes me 30 minutes to 50 minutes to get to Sugar depending on whose house he is at. Walking in and seeing that dimpled smile is PRICELESS. Nothing compares to it.
We go home, I wash bottles, make new ones, unpack and repack his bag, make dinner, feed him every two hours until bed time and at around 9:30, I sit down for the first time. At 10:00, I get in bed and prepare to do it all again tomorrow...
This working mommy thing is no joke.
When Saturday mornings come around, they are no longer looked forward to because I get to sleep all day. They are looked forward to because of this...

Now, don't tell my pediatrician, but I LOVE snuggling in bed with my baby boy. Saturdays are my day for this. When he gets up at the crack of dawn I run into his room like a little kid at Christmas, scoop him up, and snuggle him into the bed with the Mr. and I. It is my heaven. We snuggle until the morning passes. It is my most precious time. 

Big bed. Little baby. Can you find him??

Saturdays are such a gift to this working mama. 

Routine

They say that a routine is essential for an infant. Establishing that routine has been a struggle for us but things are finally coming together.

 Now, I am a schedule kinda girl. I am a teacher after all and most of us are schedule freaks. I love a good list format schedule. I get even more excited when it is time specific. :)

There is one part of that day to day routine that we have set with Sugar that is so special to me.

At night, after playing with the Mr., after bath time, after Sugar is all dressed in his snuggly PJs and sleepsack, I sit in the glider with Sugar.I rock and feed him while reading him children's bible stories.

It may seem silly to read bible stories to a 2 month old (I'm not ready to admit he will be 3 months next week). However, I promised God that when he gave me a baby to love that I would raise him in his word and by his love. I am keeping that promise.

I want Sugar to know all about our Savior from the time he can talk.

I want him to grow up to be a man of God and I don't think you can start too early.

I love reading the stories to him and talking with him about God's glory, love, and grace.

Maybe the most magical part of this time is when I have finished our story for the night, I say bedtime prayers with Sugar.

We thank Jesus for another day with each other. We thank him for all of our blessings. We ask him to send his angels to watch over Sugar as he sleeps.  Finally, I thank God for sending Sugar to earth so that I could be a mommy.

I want him to never be able to remember a night when he didn't talk to his heavenly father. I want it to be a part of his routine forever.

Suds

Suds are a gift that may seem a little strange but to a clean freak like myself they are MAGICAL.

I LOVE a clean house. I live for fresh vacuum lines, an empty clothes hamper, and the smell of Pledge dusting spray. Yep. I'm a freak.

However, there is NOTHING that compares to a fresh clean baby. The smell of baby wash on their little pudgy arms. The freshly combed hair. The snuggly clean clothes. YUM!

 My new favorite time with the little sugar is bath time even though it makes a giant mess and sometimes I get peed on. I just love watching him kick in the water and coo as I pour water over his head.

As I think about bath time and how much it brings joy to my heart I can't help but draw a parallel to my Christianity.

Jesus' blood washed away my sins. My gross, disgusting, yucky sins.

In essence he put my spit up, poop and pee, milk covered, self in the bath and poured water over me. He got down into every one of my crevices where my nastiest dirtiest sin was and scrubbed it clean just as I do with Little Sugar as a scrub in between all of his little rolls where gross things get stuck.

The labor of that sacrifice for Jesus was not fun (to say the least). But the reward of loving on a forgiven believer that is so thankful for his sacrifice was worth it. Just like the reward of snuggling a freshly washed baby is worth the time and mess that bath time can be to me.

What is so amazing to me is that, just like babies, everyday we get messy again. Covered in sin just as babies are covered in spit up, poopy and pee, milk, and boogers. Jesus offers to wash us clean. It is worth it to him just to have a relationship with him.

That's incredible.

It makes me thankful for suds. Suds remind me of my salvation.